What could possess them to ride their bike into the middle of the store?  "Yay!  I can ride a bike!  Pay attention to me!"  Use some manners!


hapter Six

here Is A Bike Rack Outside For A Reason

Spring day.  The door is held open by the Nintendo 64 lodged in the frame.  And people are flocking to the outside in the warmth of the approaching summer.

Into the store rides our friend, the customer who always comes in to Gord's store, checks everything out, annoy's Gord with many questions, and never buys anything from Gord.  Not once in recorded history.  He was very much in the "very annoying" class.

And by riding into the store, I mean that literally.  He rides his bike into the middle of the store and parks it in the middle.

"You know, we discussed this last time that I have a bike rack outside for a reason."

"But I'm afraid it might get stolen."

"Perhaps if you used your bike lock that's on your bike at this very instance."

"That's too much work.  Oh!  Is that Perfect Dark?  Can I play?"

"No.  That's reserved for paying customers."

"I'm a paying customer."

"What's your phone number?  I'll check your account."

"Uhm... it won't be in there."

"I know that.  It was a rhetorical question."

"I'll just go back there and watch then."

"Might I suggest you move your bike then, perhaps somewhere like the bike rack?"

"It will be ok right there."

"It's in the middle of my store."

But deaf ears those words fell on.  Anyway, customer walks in as this was happening, so Gord wasn't able to push the issue.  Paying customer picks up game they ordered.  Paying customer hits bike with purse when they are turning around.  It almost falls on her nice clothes and other bag on the ground.

"Oh!  I'm so sorry!"

"That's ok ma'am.  Let me take care of that."

Gord yells to non-paying customer "Your bike fell over!"

"That's ok.  I'll pick it up when I go back up front."

Gord decides to walk around the counter and picks up the bike.  Then Gord carries it to the door, out the door, and then tosses it 15 feet sending it crashing along the cement in front of the store.

"What the hell are you doing!?" screams the non-paying customer as he runs up front.

"You're bike fell over twice.  It landed just outside and to your left on the second time."

<profanities ensue.>

"Does this mean you've learned that using bike racks will prevent your bike from falling?"

"Next time I see you, I'm going to kick your ass!"

"Oh no!  Not 'next time!'  Anything but 'next time!'  Much better than 'oh, right now.'  Have a good day.  Bike's to your left."