"My friend returned some games to your
store though the return slot last night that were to have been
returned to Microplay."
"The only returns I had this morning
were mine. Maybe five games total. And all in my
"Just give me back the game."
"I would if I had any idea what you were talking about.
I get games from other stores occasionally, and I just have
them returned to those stores. Last night I had not such
"Why are you trying to steal the game! It was an
"Trust me, I've got better things to do than steal games
scratched to hell from Microplay that are covered in their
stickers and have no box. What would I get? $5 if
I was really lucky? That hardly justifies that risk of
selling what I know is not mine."
"It was Gran Turismo 3! You can get a lot for that
game! And I will have to pay Microplay $90 if I don't
bring it back."
"Gran Turismo 3? For the PS2?"
"Yes, now give it back!"
"Now I know definitely that I do not have it."
"If you don't give it back, you'll have to give me a new
copy or I'll phone the cops! What you're doing is
"Your mastery of the legal system humbles my mighty
efforts. You are truly the master of all matters legal.
I humbly cast myself before you and ask that you not pursue
such an action. Let us work together to resolve this
"You're going to give me the game?"
"Yes, I'm going to give you a sealed copy. But
I'll need your name and phone number."
"Because Gran Turismo 3 isn't out yet. It won't be
out for another two weeks. It was delayed by a month."
"Uhm.... it's out."
"No, no it's not. And when that magical copy that
does not exist showed up, I had to create a shrine for it in
the back. But the shrine is invisible. If you look
right there, you can almost see it if you believe."
"Now, I cannot touch the shrine for the gods will strike
me down. Let us call the police and they shall remove
the game from the shrine. Would you like to call, or
should I? For only they have the power remove the game
from the shrine."
"Might I suggest next time you try using this plan to
steal a game, you use a game that is actually out? I
would suspect it would work much better."