gathered in the back of the store watching an entranced gamer
complete Final Fantasy VIII. During this time, a lone
individual entered the store and went straight for the N64
game thief bait.
Upon noticing this, Gord then returned to the front counter.
He observed that the bait was taken.
"Anything in particular you're looking for?" queried
"Uhm… Do you have any more copies of Einhander?" was the
response, as the individual apparently paid no attention to
the stack of Einhanders directly in front of him.
"Yes, I have lots." Then after a dramatic pause Gord
asked "So, are you familiar with the phrase 'the jig is
Suddenly a van screams to a halt in front of the store and the
driver hits the horn. Buddy then books it outside and
runs towards the van full bore. The van door slides open
and the mysterious individual does a tuck and roll into the
side of the van. The van then screams off down the
"Well, that was odd" noted Gord. "Why would
someone go to all that trouble of setting such an elaborate
scheme up only to use a van with a company logo on the side?"
While normally Gord would phone up the person directly and ask
why they stole a game, since buddy had gone for a collective
stack of crap N64 games he phoned the police.
<Half hour later>
The police return with buddy in hand. Seems he really
wants to apologize and pay for the games. Something
about being on probation and he'll lose his job, go to jail,
and how he was offering to pay for the games to avoid those
"Hmm" thought Gord. For he was the Caesar and the
life of the young thief was his to control. Would Gord
be a benevolent Gord or a contentious Gord?
Today Gord was a benevolent Gord. For the prices on the
crap N64 games were exponentially priced far beyond their
values to increase the attractiveness of the titles to
"Very well, here you go" and the Gord was paid in full.
"I trust I will not see you in here again for a number of
years?" asked Gord as he brought up the issue of the
excommunication of the would be thief.
"Actually, I'll be back on Friday."
"What?" decried Gord, setback by this unforeseen
"I like this store, I'll be back on payday to buy more games."
And thus the thief was reformed and made into a traditional
customer. The work of Gord transforms all!